updates

I know I havent blogged in a LONG time so let me grace ya'll with a couple updates. i'm fine. tramaine is good. i've began the search for our home & its not as easy as i thought it would be. i mean, i could just move into base housing but whats the fun in that?! this will be my first HOUSE purchase so i plan to make it a good one for me & my family. me & maine plan to start our family within the next couple years so i DEFINITELY take this to heart. i'm also about to purchase another car. i'm thinking something along the lines of a BMW/AUDI.. i mean, i live in Germany so why not?! babe wants a Lexus but i havent seen too many of those here. i guess that'll have to be determined at a later date. our 1 year anniversary is also coming up! one of many gifts i plan to give my babe is me dropping my maiden name (since i had it hyphenated). it was SUPPOSED to be a suprise but we played a little guessing game & babe figured it out sooooo..... thats about it for now. maybe more later :o) ciao!

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advice please!

i'm usually the type of person to figure stuff out on my own but this one's stumping me. i consider myself average (in terms of height & weight).. for my own personal reasons i've been trying different things with my diet & fitness. at one point, i wanted to gain some weight (in hopes that it would all float to my ass & hips, lol). well, that didnt work out exactly as planned. i've been running regularly & my peers are noticing the difference. my body is looking amazing (if i do say so myself :o) lol). what i want to know is this:

WHY IS MY FACE STILL SO FAT?!

how do i slim that?! any suggestions?! all help greatly appreciated...

in my skin.

i've been called every name in the book. it doesn't bother me and it doesn't get me down. i kinda like it. i've had ppl go out there way to anonymously tell me these things. thats the morale booster for me. i think VERY highly of myself. i'm comfortable in my skin & i like ME the way I am. why should i be unhappy with the person that i have to look at in the mirror daily?! thats absurd.

i live w/o regrets. sure, everyone says it but i ACTUALLY live it. if you were having fun while you were doing it & it brought you pleasure why deny it?! i'm honest with myself. that why i can laugh when ppl think they're "telling me something new" about myself. no one knows me better than me.. this is why i appreciate "haters". just b/c someone disagrees with me doesn't classify them as a hater, in my book. thats not where i'm going with this. i call you a hater if you smiled in my face & secretly plotted my demise. i call you a hater if you grudgingly wanted what i had & let your envy overcome you. man, i could go on forever...

really though, we all have a little bit of hate in us. its what drives us sometimes to be great. boundaries are what set us apart though. i don't grudge. you never know what someone had to do (or who they had to fuck, lol) to get where they're at. thats why i work so hard. i know what i'm doing. i know where i'm at. & i know where i'm going.

1.1.2010 ♥

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